Jingle Jungle

How do you birds do it? How do you become accessorizing masters? We could literally be in the same outfit, black shirt and jeans and you look all hip and cool and I look all drabby and full of teenage angst! Teach me Obi won!

I've secretly picked out my accessories champion and I'm trying to master her great and powerful style. She is truly a superior accessorizer. An icon of all things that clasp - bracelets, necklaces, shoes, earrings. It's mega. She's got the ability to make a statement with a piece of flair. She's my bling idol.

Oh and my favorite thing about her? She never, no never, jangles. You know what I'm talking about. I swear she does the shake test before she leaves the house and if it rattles it comes off. You can admire her visually without having to hear it. No clankity clank, tinkle tink, bang whomp kapow! And I think that's half of her magical power, she's silent like a stephanie meyer's vampire and it draws you in. You feel the need to come closer because you have to see if she's wearing something you can't hear from three offices away that she has a bracelet on. The song isn't Silence is the sound of your bracelets clinking. No the song is Silence is Golden.

I'm onto your jewlery mantra, good accessory lady. Give me like maybe another 5 years in your presence and maybe I'll understand the art of necklaces and earrings that "go together" not match.

Me & the Piemaker!

Okay my blogging has gotten majorly inconsistent, but so has my life. And so I've become reflective on the idea of what I would do if I could just magically change the world to make the day to day more dynamic/entertaining/colorful? How would I technicolor dream coat my life?

Pushing Daisies!!! Tell me you people watched that show!! I started a protest the day they cancelled this show, I mailed mood enhancing pies, a pop-up book that guided them back to my tv set, but to no avail. It was just gone from my life. Sorrow.

Hmm where to start. Okay first, I'd love to have random singing, musical moments in my life. Like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WfQ488hHKpY

Truthfully I do this probably on a daily basis in my head and though an actual live action moment might not be 100% possible, I'd love the opportunity to be like "DJ, hit it!" and just sum up a conversation or a moment with a little tune or number. Sometimes words just miss the mark.

Second, set design. Life would be better if color, print, texture existed everywhere we were. You catch a little bit of it in the video clip above, but if you are really interested check out this website, there are some good photos of it. I just think sometimes life is boring because of the lack of inspiration in paint color and carpeting.

http://www.denofgeek.com/television/296961/design_appreciation_the_sets_of_pushing_daisies.html

I'm talking variety people! Patterns, plaids, bold colors! So help me if I go into one more tan on tan house that the wife calls Buttercream on Mocha!!

Third, I'd take the wardrobe in a heart beat! And if I could convince Josh to dress like the piemaker.....

Fourth, I'd create me a friend like Emerson Cod. He's the detective on the show and is a pushy, straight talking jerk. One of my favorite Emerson lines, "The truth ain't like puppies: a bunch running around and you pick your favorite." Words to live by, yo. However all ruff and gruff, he is lovable because he's quirky! He has this uncanny ability to get people in a rhyming rhythm when they speak. Usually the best minute of dialogue in the show. Just in normal dialogue and then suddenly it starts rhyming. I want to rhyme in my everyday speech and not have people think I'm mocking them. I tried it one day, people got angry thinking I was making fun of them. It wasn't pretty. Back to Emerson, he crochets! He has designed a pop-up book. He prefers to call people by nickname he has created only. Oh and he can dress. I have friends with elements. I've got an avid crocheter, and a great dresser, I even have a jerk. :) But the total package people, it'd be awesome. I'd want to carry him around in my purse.


Technicolored my life would be! It would still be life, just maybe more pleasing! What girl doesn't want her own soundtrack to her life, more pizazz in decor, wardrobe and an Emerson!

Manly Games and Melodies

"No! Avenge me!"

Josh is playing video games with his buddy and though he kindly has turned the sound down so that I don't have to hear grenade explosions, repetitive gun fire, or computer character death I do get to hear him as he hollers out his heroic moments and terror. "I rocked that guy!"

Josh tries really hard to keep it G rated for me. He says things like, "Hey Mister, that ain't very friendly." or "Oh no! They owned my faced!" I know it is going really well when he randomly giggles, it is really intense when he gets silent and it is really bad when he starts hollering! "That's horse crap! Kill that guy" "Take that pork chop guy!"

But my favorite part is while the map reloads. They sing, that is right two grown men who just moments ago were shooting people to bits in the virtual world are now belting it out. It is awesome. I'm guaranteed to hear "Can You Feel the Love Tonight?" and at some point "Little diddy about Jack and Diane...." sometimes you get Girl from Impanema. It is the third random song that I love. You never really know what you are going to get. I've got my fingers crossed for a little Kelly Clarkson or Kanye West.

You've served us well....adieu

Once upon a time there was a darling husband and wife who went on a little camp out. They remembered stopped to feed themselves prior to arriving at camp swinging by their neighborhood grocer to purchase their dinner. Just because they were eating in the car didn't mean they couldn't eat in style! They bought chicken, macaroni salad, Hawaiian rolls. It was a magnificent car meal. Wife in her over grabbing way had procured too many plastic forks at the deli. Not to being a waster, she tucked a fork up in the visor telling her husband that one day he would love her because he'd be somewhere and he'd be in desperate need of an eating utensil and then...... YES!! Thus was born "Emergency Fork!"



Fast forward to months later, we've had a few good snickers out of seeing Emergency Fork but most of the time neither of us remember it is even there. Poor neglected E.F. On this particular night, Josh is taking me on a hot date to dinner and the blazing Arizona sun is invading my retina. In a fit of blindness I fumbled for the visor and heard the fatal crack of damaged goods.
Woe is me!! I have ruined Emergency Fork! Josh grumbles at me and reaches up to jokingly discipline me with the carnage I have cause and in his grasping, he yells "EF DOWN!!!".....
It's over! There is no saving it now. Not even for memorial sake. And in between my sobbing and snickering at my failed attempt at emergency preparedness Josh points out very somberly, "Though fork may have left us, it has always left an imprint on us."

Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes

I have this tender moment that keeps running around in my head from my recent trip to Washington. In all the fun, rushing and celebration of the trip I had the pleasure of sharing a quiet moment with two of my favorite girls, my niece Abby and my sweet sister-in-law Jessica. This moment of love, of giggles, of joy – this memory resonates peace to my soul.

Jessica is Josh’s twin and she is mentally disabled. Our Jessica is love. Abby just turned two. She is vivacious, quizzical, all things two! A visit to the Haws house is full of aunts, uncles and cousin visits, outings, projects and chats. It’s a blissful blitz from touchdown to takeoff. But for this brief moment I found myself sitting quietly in the same couch cushion on the couch next to my Jessie watching Abby play with her toys. Jessica always sits too close, it’s how she says, “I love you.” The house was still and we all seemed to be enjoying the moment. I put my arm around Jessica who happens to be the music aficionado in the family and started a silly version of Head, Shoulder, Knees and Toes giving her a honk on the nose at the end. Jessica let out a pleasant squeal and I looked up to see Abby standing at the end of the couch waiting to join the party. I smiled at her and she floated forward in the way two year old princesses do and climbed onto my lap. Now I had my hands full but I wasn’t about to stop the fun! I’m Auntie Ellen! So I braced myself and we started another round, I worked one hand pointing out Jessie’s head, shoulder, knees and toes while simultaneously pointing out Abby’s eyes, ears, mouth and nose. Not only did they laugh when I finished, but they clapped! We moved on to other songs, “Three Little Monkeys” “The Itsy Bitsy Spider” “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” all three of us completely happy to sit squished on one couch cushion singing sweet simple happy songs.

I don’t remember how the moment ended or why we stopped, but I will never forget the way they watched my hands as I did the actions, the way they laughed and clapped as I finished a song and the pure love we all felt for each other in that moment enveloped in a leather couch in Grandpa’s house in Washington.

Melts in your mouth, Not in your spine!

I have a darling friend who has been suffering from a major back problem the last few months. Diligent has friend followed doctors recommendations, stretching, bending, allowing them to poke and prod. Yes, there has been some relief, but mostly nothing. We all wait for the magical cure all.

I sprained my back muscles last week and I would say minutely began to understand what friend has been suffering. In my one-tenth way I understand how uncomfortable it is. My highest sympathies to you, friend! And so as I cruised the Internet this evening, my eye was naturally drawn to an inspiring article on CNN, "Blue M&M dye reduces spine injury in mice" Say what?? That's right! The blue dye they use in M&M and Gatorade if injected directly into the spinal cord can heal the spine! For rizzo!! (Rizzo - also a famous Muppets mouse) And so I'm thinking STAT! We need 30 CCs for friend! And then I read that there is a small interesting side effect... you start out looking like this...
Cute little creepy red eyed mouse. Look at him all sore back watching TV on his stomach just like my friend does. Poor buddy. Then they squirt you full of M&M blue and you end up looking like this....

Smurf Mouse!!! The thing is that the blue goes away. You only stay blue for "awhile." So the question is, would it be worth it? Would you go blue to get your function back? What if "awhile" is 3 weeks? 6 months? 2 years?

I totally would do it! For the medical bonus and because blue is beautiful. Not to mention slimming I hear! Holla!

Challenged.

We've had a joyous June. Josh's brother Nathan came home from his mission to Virginia and my brother Grant came home from his mission to Philadelphia as well! I squeezed girls camp in there too. In my own special way of doing things I thought oooh I know how, let's try come up with a person challenge!! So I challenged myself to do something I wouldn't normally do at each place and so here is the list:

1. WA state with Josh's Family: I really did two things of note. First, I rode a tractor. Yes I've been part of a farming family for how many years? 7. And yes this was my first time on a tractor. It was fun! Thanks Nate. And second, I went with the girls and got those extendo french manicure nails at a salon. Were they gorgeous? YES! Am I meant to have nails like that? NO! I made it a few weeks and then got all angsty because somehow my short nails I've allowed to become part of my personality and the long pretty nails were throwing off my groove and making me feel not me. Don't get me wrong, it was fun! Josh loved how pretty my hands looked. I just cracked, they didn't feel like me.

Embarrassing moment: I taught Josh's family about "awkward turtle." Everyone is laughing and trying it out. And they all go back to talking and I say to Josh and his cousin Alex, "You know when something is really awkward there is always the awkward sea turtle." And I throw my hands in my armpits and swing my elbows in the air while bobbing my head. Now they both hysterically laughed which is what I was going for, but then I looked up and about half the room had seen my dance but not heard what I said. Sweet moves Ellen!!

2. Girls camp: I actually tried really hard to obey the rules. Sounds boring right? But if you know me at all this is a huge challenge for me. So go me!

Embarrassing moment: I managed to pick the squeakiest bunk bed ever! I mean honestly I couldn't scratch my nose without a squeaky rendition of a John Sousa melody erupting. The embarrassing part is I kept forgetting how blasted squeaky it was. So I'm in the leaders cabin so there were always spiritual and deep conversations going on and during one particularly intense moment I walked over and plopped down to take off my shoes and just erupted the room with SCKAWEEEK!!! then starting giggling. The ladies just moved on, I don't think they really noticed but I was embarrassed and I thought it was hysterical.

3. OR state with my Family: I swam in a lake! It's not that I've never done this before it's just always a big deal when I do. I'm not a great swimmer. Okay the truth is, I'm not a swimmer. I don't like to have my face in the water it's oppressive. (Yes, I'm considering adult swim lessons.) But we were at this gorgeous lake, we had life vests, we were out on a rented boat and it was a beautiful day! And I just jumped! It was awesome!! Flipping freezing, but awesome!

Embarrassing moment: Not really as embarrassing as just ridiculous. My parents own the game Rock Band. And the girls - Shannon, Stacie and I decide we are going to rock it one night! So Stacie is singing, Shannon is shredding it on the guitar and I'm going to drum. But even on easy I can't even begin to play this song. So my brother Keith takes over the foot pedal and I'm still loosing and so now he's playing the foot pedal and beat boxing the rhythm of the drums to me so that hopefully I can just make it through the song. I finally did (Thank You Keith!!) but it was the special Olympics version of easy drumming on Rock Band.

So today is the 3rd of July both Josh and I have off work. Maybe I should go find something brave to do.... navel piercings anyone??