Friday, May 22, 2009

Elphaba says, "No good deed goes unpunished!!"

I had this fun idea at work this week. We are getting a new cafeteria/catering group in and they removed the coffee machines early. This is a serious tragedy. Honestly I spied several people wondering the halls with empty coffee mugs looking lost and forlorn. Productivity took a dramatic drop. And so I hatched my plan. I get a little giddy when I get to be fun and spontaneous. My homies and I put out some coffee, sodas and water with a little sign thanking people, is for fun! A little act of service thanking our peeps for taking care of our peeps! Fun right? As we set it up one of the girls said, “It is kind of like being the Easter bunny.” We were all giddy and chipper. Here is where it takes the ugly turn….

As we are setting up, mind you we had been there maybe 30 seconds we were attacked. Not by a swarm of bees, that would make this story cooler, but by a middle aged woman with manners of a poorly raised 8 year old. She literally stormed the table as though she’d never seen soda pop.

Mz. Thang: I hear you have Dr. P.
Me: Umm, I don’t know. Dig around in there.

So as I finish setting up she literally picks up every single can and puts it back in the ice bucket slowly getting more and more disgruntled as she can’t find a Dr. Pepper.

Ms. Thang: What no Dr. Pepper or Diets?
Me: Well, they are free sodas….

She then proceeded to take a soda, a water and a cup of coffee. I couldn’t help myself.

Me: If you could only take one, more people could get something.
Mz. Thang in her most snide voice: “Oh, I’m sharing with other people in my department.”
Then she just turned and left. No thanks, just turned and flew off back to her high castle in the sky. Here are the list of things that spontaneously and combustively went through my head as she left….
  1. “And then I’d kick her sir!” – Bartok from the movie Anastasia
  2. “No good deed goes unpunished!!” - I’m horribly addicted to the Wicked soundtrack right now.
  3. “Come talking that trash and I’ll pull your card….” - Dynamite Hack - Boys in da Hood
  4. “Adrienne!!” - Rocky
  5. She MUST be Canadian……

That’s right…all in a blink of an eye, that’s how my mind fought back! So take that! “No Dr. P for you!” -Soup Nazi voice.


Anonymous said...

I am certain she was canadian. Jerks.

The Wixom Zoo said...

SO sorry! That's what you get for being selfless, nice and all that jazz. Maybe next time you should only put out kool-aid! Bwahahahahaa!!! That'll teach her!