Thursday, April 19, 2012

Pirate Eye

You know what is not cool? Waking up one morning and being totally blind in one eye. Then spending the whole day at the doctor, emergency room and ophthalmologist as my vision slowly returned and getting this medical gem of advice, "Weird things happen when you are pregnant." Hooray for medical advancements!

However, you know what is cool about temporary blindness? You start to consider your pirate name. Lucky for me I found my pirate name years ago when I was working claims with that one insurance company. There was a customer named Gwendolyn Goldtooth. Best pirate chick name ever. Captain Goldtooth has a nice ring to it, am I right? Also Josh says I'd look hot with an eye patch further proving I married the right man.

Lucky for me all is well, all vision has returned. Lucky for the safety of the seas I haven't gone rogue and started my pirating career. Because listen if the day ever comes, ye be warned. Ragnar Danneskjold has nothing on me.


Chris, Krista and Conor Bolton said...

Totally go for Gwendolyn Goldtooth!

Staci Kramer said...

I LOVE that this is categorized in the "who is John Galt" section. Did I ever tell you about the time I had episodes of going half numb and retarded for ten minutes at a time? I went ten minutes totally unable to remember where the letter I fell in the alphabet and what my sister's last name was. I ended up with the same diagnosis. Abe was worth the IQ points.

Ellen said...

Holy crow! That is scary Staci. Who knows why that kind of stuff happens.